Dealing with Stress

M-CC-Stress-ball

Hey guys I was recently speaking to someone who seemed very bothered so I asked him what was wrong. As he begin to rant off several things that wasn’t going as planned, I realized that his issues wasn’t the things per se, he was just stressed. So I gave him some advice that I wanted to share with you to apply to your life when you start to get overwhelmed.

  1. Check Your Perception. Know this, stress can change your perception. What you would normally consider as menial, seemingly  becomes real big after stress is introduced. Make sure that your perceptions haven’t been warped by pressure by keeping strong counsel around you. (Ecclesiastes 4:9 says Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their labor:) Having a team and/or support system will serve you well and keep your outlook objective.
  2. Rest. When we have a lot on our minds we tend to get little to no rest. Resting is the way the body was designed to renew itself. If you don’t rest, you can’t be your best, and that will affect your production, agility, and your overall mentality. I know you are over consumed with whatever is challenging you, but  you have to do what it takes to rest!
  3. Find your center. Just as much as we need to be clear headed to have proper rest, we need to be clear headed to properly pray. If your mind is jumping from one thought to the next, riddled with worry you will have a challenging time connecting with God who IS peace. You have to be able to create a space of peace in your life where God lives, and be able to connect to that space at any time, any place, and disconnect from this natural world and it’s worry.

Doing these three things alone will keep you when the pressures of life are trying to take you under! Leave your comments and let me know what are some other ways you like to deal with stress.

Perception – How are you looking at it?

Half-empty glass

Today I want to talk about perception. Have you ever seen the perception images on the internet where one person looks at a glass and they are very positive because they see it half full and then they show the other person they are sad because they see the glass half empty? It’s a great example of your perception, how information is filtered through your senses to draw conclusions.

It’s time to heighten your senses, if you do you will perceive that good is in everything and is everywhere. Yes the good is everywhere. I have gone through some horrible things in my life, things that I just thought there was no way to recover from. I then get a revelation, or rather I was able to perceive the wisdom in my situation and realize this was never meant to harm me it was only meant to make me better. The situation I was in didn’t change, but my perception of the situation did.

Life is going to be life. You are going to have experience after experience of the proverbial good, bad, and ugly until Jesus returns or death, whichever comes first. So if we’re clear that you can’t change life, the next thing to change is how you view life. Will you view it as the glass being half empty or will you view it as the glass being half full?

Life Questions?? Part 2

o-LIFE-COACH-HELP-QUESTIONS-facebook.jpg

Happy Thanksgiving Eve for those of you who celebrate the American Holiday! For those of you who don’t Happy Wednesday to you just the same.

Have you ever looked at a person and their actions and wondered, What are they thinking? Don’t they know that the consequences for those actions will yield a series of events that will affect them for a lifetime? People are so now driven, that they forget that they have their lives to consider. As a society we tend to get so emotionally driven that our intellect or better yet our good common sense goes down the drain. I’ve seen people get caught up in the moment and have unprotected sex with a casual acquaintance recently met, now they have created a life together and are connected to each other for a “lifetime”. I’ve heard of stories of folks being curious about drugs, got high once and now battle addiction which controls their entire life to this day.

I always have to ask these people, What Were You Thinking? Typically they don’t have a proper response, as if their thinking was hijacked and they were totally not in control. Now knowing what I know about life, I believe that is true. To that point, I need to uplift the power of thought. Good ole’ fashioned rational thought. – it’s extinct –

We need to employ thought back into our lives, our minds have gone dull through over sensationalized stimuli such as social media, TV, games, movies, sweets etc that we are loosing our minds LITERALLY. Before we know it, we have found ourselves making financial, relationship, and/or career decisions that go in the exact opposite direction we intended.

I want to challenge you today to recapture your thoughts, find a good book to read or a good mental game to sharpen yourself. Thinking or the lack thereof can change the direction of your entire life.

Have You Counted Up the Cost?

00423302bdfb67c5978c3de94318689c

Luke 14:28-30 The Message (MSG)

28-30 “Is there anyone here who, planning to build a new house, doesn’t first sit down and figure the cost so you’ll know if you can complete it? If you only get the foundation laid and then run out of money, you’re going to look pretty foolish. Everyone passing by will poke fun at you: ‘He started something he couldn’t finish.’

Are you one of those people who start great but never finish at all. When you put it in perspective, the goal of life is to finish, you don’t have to be the fastest, but you have to finish. So we’re not talking about how long it takes you to get to your finish line, we’re talking about you never making it. That is a horrible cycle that many people are in and they have grown miserable because the fruit of a non finisher is called sameness. Year after year no real progress, just the same ole same ole.

I believe a lot of what contributes to this sameness is lack of preparation. Are you one that emotionally make decisions, flying by the seat of your pants or are you one that takes time to think things out fully? I’m willing to bet if you answer was the latter than you are more likely to finish what you started. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes it’s very necessary to go with the gut and make fast moves, but if you are constantly going with the gut but getting the same negative results, it might be time to change your method some.

The scripture above says that you’ll end up looking foolish if you start laying a foundation but don’t finish the building.

It’s time for some serious introspection, are you the type of person the scripture speaks of? Today it’s time to make a change, don’t haste- take you time and consider all things so that when you make a decision it sticks and will be of a benefit to you!!

The Daddy and His Daughter

12036859_144319355914453_1163064614647263922_n

I recently read an article where a newlywed daughter gave her father a certificate of purity that her hymen was still in tact signifying that she kept her virginity as promised to her father when she was 13 years old. What a statement of commitment in 2015!

In spite of this piece of positivity, it amazes me that there are still some negative comments surrounding this ordeal. People are saying that it’s a sexist move being that the groom couldn’t prove his virginity, others saying it too extreme. Here’s what I say and want to lift that in my opinion is more precious than the certificate itself – the bond between the father and the daughter. I don’t see in this story as much of a commitment to the groom to present herself as chaste as I see a commitment to her father that was reinforced by relationship and bonding. As fathers, I believe we forget that we are the first man our daughters will ever have real intimate relationship with. Your touch and energy of love will guide her when you can’t be there to steer in the right direction or give your wisdom. All other male relationships in her life will be judged by the relationship she has with you. Do you know what gives me the right to say this? The relationship I have with my daughter – I love her! We travel, have random breakfast and dinner dates, love visiting arcades and are headed to the opera in Chicago in December. This is the energy of kindness, care, and concern that I give her now that will protect her when she is in danger, shelter her when she far a way, and guide her when she needs direction.

If you are reading this and you are a father, be there for your daughter. Show them by example what it means to be a man, your actions will engrave itself in their conscious and will impact their lives forever.

This blog is dedicated to my daughter Tyra – LOVE YOU!

Getting Ready For the Holidays – Gratefulness

1420475548360

As we continue in our discussion about holiday preparation, there is one word we need to put special emphases on and that is gratefulness. Let’s talk about how gratefulness or the lack thereof can affect your entire season.

In a stuck moment, it’s hard to see positive forces when obstacles are blaring and fears are looming. This is a good time to be grateful. Not grateful for what has us stuck, but appreciating what doesn’t. Gratitude helps us see our situation in a way that can lessen panic, and could open up our thinking to new solutions.

Thing is, people aren’t hardwired to be grateful. And, like any skill worth having, gratitude requires practice. There are three stages to gratefulness 1. recognizing what we’re grateful for 2. acknowledging it 3. appreciating it. Isn’t that Simple, right? And the benefits of practicing gratitude can be life-altering. Here are three things gratitude does for you.

  1. Gratitude puts situations into perspective. When we can see the good as well as the bad, it becomes more difficult to complain and stay stuck.
  2. Gratitude helps us realize what we have. This can lessen our need for wanting more all the time.
  3. Gratitude strengthens relationships, improves health, reduces stress, and, in general, makes us happier.

Again, let’s get an early start on the Holiday Blues – let’s get our gratefulness in check NOW!

How’s Your Fruit?

Hey Family!

I hope your weekend was great. I really enjoyed our conversation on last week. Let’s go ahead and delve into this week’s convo!

I know that we put the burden of responsibility on the pastor and the church to be “THAT” example in the earth to draw people. I today BEG TO DIFFER! The burden of responsibility is YOU. You are a walking, talking, living, breathing, billboard for Jesus. Before a person decides to stop their normal Sunday routine, put on clothes, take the time, energy and money to go to a building for 2 hrs with people they don’t know to worship someone that can’t see or feel, (pause and breathe – this a long sentence so far and we are not done yet) they are going to look at you and see if you’re living a life that’s worth all that.

Yes! Perhaps they haven’t accepted your invite because you live to low of a Christian type of life. #Selah

This week I want to discuss The Fruit of the Spirit and how having them affects our everyday living. Before then though let me say this again – Perhaps they haven’t accepted your invite because you live to low of a Christian type of life.  

Looking forward to tomorrow’s conversation.